pressemeddelse fra de thailandske sundhedsmyndigheder.
efter omfattende opdateringer fra de thailandske sygehuse er der ingen faranger der mister fingre tæer eller lemmer, på grund af kuldestrømninger over hele thailand fra doi inthanon,s udbrud af isnende kulde.
Saksede flg. stk. matematisk logik, på en Thailandsk datingprofil, på [url]dateinasia.com
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* ROMANCEMATHEMATICS *
Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
* OFFICE ARITHMETIC *
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
* SHOPPING MATH *
A man will pay for a item he needs.
A woman will pay for items that she doesn't need.
* GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS *
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
* HAPPINESS *
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
* LONGEVITY *
Married men live longer than single men do, but married menare a lot more willing to die.
* PROPENSITY TO CHANGE *
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. **
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does. **
* DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE *
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
A guy walks into the local welfare office, marches straight up to the Counter and says, "Hi.? You know, I just HATE drawing welfare.
I'd really Rather have a job."
The social worker behind the counter says, "Your timing is excellent....
We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur And bodyguard for his beautiful nymphomaniac daughter. You'll have to Drive around in his Mercedes, but he'll supply all of your clothes.
Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll be expected to Escort her on her overseas holiday trips. You will have to satisfy her Sexual urges. You'll be provided a two-bedroom apartment above the garage.
The starting salary is $200,000 a year."
The guy, wide-eyed, says, "You're bullshittin' me!"
The social worker says, "Yeah, well... You started it."
While walking through the Boulder Colorado woods a man came up to another man hugging a tree with his ear firmly against the tree. Seeing this he inquired, "Just out of curiosity, what the heck are you doing? "I'm listening to the music of the tree," the other man replied. "You gotta be kiddin' me."
"No, would you like to give it a try?"
Understandably curious, the man says, "Well, OK..." So he wrapped his arms around the tree and pressed his ear up against it. With this the other guy slapped a pair of handcuffs on him, took his wallet, jewelry, car keys, then stripped him naked and left.
Two hours later another nature lover strolled by, saw this guy handcuffed to the tree stark naked, and asked, "What the hell happened to you?" He told the guy the whole story about how he got there.
When he finished telling his story, the other guy shook his head in sympathy, walked around behind him, kissed him behind the ear and said...
The Sergeant bellows "Outta those bunks! Birthday suit inspection! I want you to fall in outside, NOW! Buck nekkid! Stand close enough to make the man in front of you smile! MOVE, YOU FUCKERS!"
The barracks quickly empty, the men fall in and shiver at attention. The Sergeant hollers "LOOSEN RANKS!"
The ranks separate a bit.
The Captain approaches, carrying a swagger stick. With the stick, he swats one of the men across the chest. "Did that hurt, Mister?" the Captain demands.
"No, SIR!" the recruit shouts.
"Why not?" barks the Captain.
"Because I'm a U.S. Marine, SIR!"
The Captain nods, and moves on down the front rank a bit. He whacks another man across the butt. "Did that hurt, Mister?"
"No, SIR!"
"Why not?" "Because I'm a U.S. Marine, SIR!"
Satisfied, the Captain continues on down the rank. He notices that one of the men is sporting a huge erection, and brings his stick down sharply on the proffered target. "Did that hurt, Mister?"
"No, SIR!"
"Why not?"
"Because it belongs to the fellow behind me, SIR!"
Your car is Japanese. Your pizza is Italian. Your potatoes are German. Your wine is Chilean. Your democracy is Greek. You drink Brazilian coffee and Tamil tea. You wear a Swiss watch and French fashion. Your shirt is Indian. Your shoes are Thai. Your radio is Korean. Your vodka is Russian. Don´t complain if your neighbor is an immigrant.
Sunday this old lady boards the bus and takes a seat right behind two little old Italian men and as the bus rolls down the street she begins to listen to the old men converse and the first litlle old Italian says
"Emma comma first and then I cumma one time Then two asses cumma together and den I cumma again, and den dem two asses cumm together anudder time, and den I cumma once and pee twice, den I cumma one last time
At hearing this the enraged old lady berates the old Italians saying "Why I have never heard such filth! In this country we do not discuss our sex lives on the bus!"
And the little old Italian man says "Whats upa wit you? I no talka bout sex, I try to teacha my frienda how to spella Mississippi!"
Netbrugere diskuterer aktuelle emner.
I dag: Sexturisme
100611 kl. 17.32
Af
Kan vi ikke snart blive fri for den dér mediemyte om, at det hovedsagelig er fede, gamle, halvskaldede, fordrukne og svedende mænd i katastrofeblomstrede skjorter, der tager til Thailand for at få noget på den dumme?
Selv går jeg for eksempel mest i ensfarvede T-shirts – og jeg ser ikke meget til den såkaldte ’sexturisme’ her i den syndige thailandske badeby, hvor jeg holder meget af at komme.
Derimod ser jeg seksuelt underernærede singlemænd fra Vesten rejse til Pattaya for at købe lidt uforpligtende sex hos de lokale glædespiger, der på den måde kan forsørge deres familie uden at skulle stå i giftige dampe og flette bambusmøbler 90 timer om ugen.
Der er faktisk tale om en slags ulandshjælp, og spørgsmålet er vel i det hele taget, om Danida ikke burde gå ind og støtte denne form for konkret fattigdomsbekæmpelse.
100611 kl. 17.44
Af Karen_Dynemose
Hvor er det sørgeligt, at nogen kan tænke som Henrik Listepik. Men det skal jo nok lykkes ham at få udviklingsminister Søren Pind med på ideen om Danida-støttet prostitution, og inden vi får set os om, vil Folkekirkens Nødhjælp sikkert erstatte ’Giv en ged til Rwanda’ med ’Køb en luder i Thailand’.
Vi kan ikke være det bekendt.
100611 kl. 17.48
Af
Det er lige præcis sådan nogle feministkvinder som dig, der er skyld i, at vestlige mænd tager til Pattaya for at få tilfredsstillet deres mest basale behov. Hvornår har du måske sidst stillet dig til rådighed for en mand og tilbudt ham uforpligtende sex?
100611 kl. 18.01
Af Karen_Dynemose
Jeg tror, det var i sommeren 1979. Men han takkede nej, fordi han skulle hjem og forberede en forelæsning.
100611 kl. 18.02
Af bolsjefar
Tak til Henrik Listepik for det meget oplysende indlæg. Kan du fortælle lidt om, hvor gamle pigerne i Pattaya er?
A blonde suspects that her boyfriend is cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun.
She goes to his apartment that same day, with the gun in hand. Sure enough, when she opens the door, she finds her boyfriend in the arms of a redhead. She points the gun at her boyfriend at stares him down for a moment. Then, suddenly, she's overcome with grief, so she puts the gun up to the side her head.
On a deserted island there were three women, a blond a brunette and a redhead. They needed to get back to the mainland and the only way was by swimming. The redhead goes first. She makes it a quarter of the way then drowns. The brunnette goes second. She makes it one third of the way then drowns. The blonde comes last. She makes it one half of the way, gets tired and then turns back.
A blonde has just gotten a new sports car. She cuts out in front of a semi, and almost causes it to drive over a cliff. The driver furiously motions for her to pull over, and she does. The driver gets out and draws a circle and tells her to stand in it. Then he gets out his knife and cuts up her leather seats. He turns around and sees she's smiling. So he goes to his truck, takes out a baseball bat, and starts busting her windows and beating her car. He looks back to see that she's laughing. He's really mad now, so he takes his knife and slices her tires. He turns around and she's laughing so hard, she's about to fall down. He demands, "What's so funny?" She says, "Every time you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle!"
If you've never been to Asia then this may make no sense but those of you that have will appreciate the love can develop between your average holiday maker and the "Bum Gun".
MOD er - at komme sent hjem efter en tur i byen med gutterne, blive angrebet i døren af konen med en kost og have mod nok til at spørge: Gør du stadig rent, eller skal du ud og flyve en tur?
NOSSER er - at komme hjem... efter en tur i byen, stinke af øl og parfume samt have læbestift på skjorten og have nosser nok til at klaske konen i røven og sige: Så er det din tur, tykke !!!
